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Mind Your Own Business


Byron Katie is an author and speaker who created a powerful process called ā€œThe Work.ā€ In her first book, Loving What Is, Katie suggests that there are three types of business in the world: ā€œMy Business,ā€ ā€œYour Businessā€ (ā€œOther Peopleā€™s Businessā€), and Godā€™s Business. She points out that anytime you find yourself in ā€œOther Peopleā€™s Businessā€ or ā€œGodā€™s Business,ā€ you feel stressed. Why? Because you donā€™t have any business in ā€œOther Peopleā€™s Businessā€ or ā€œGodā€™s Business.ā€ When youā€™re in ā€œOther Peopleā€™s Business,ā€ or ā€œGodā€™s Business,ā€ you have no control and no influence. In fact, when youā€™re in ā€œOther 

 
Peopleā€™s Businessā€ or ā€œGodā€™s Business,ā€ you are powerless.[1]
Put another way, when youā€™re in ā€œOther Peopleā€™s Business,ā€ or ā€œGodā€™s Business,ā€ youā€™re in Victim Consciousness, so any action you take will only make things worse.
You may find it difficult to grasp the difference between ā€œMy Business,ā€ and ā€œOther Peopleā€™s Business,ā€ so hereā€™s some helpful advice. If you canā€™t seem to find the line that divides ā€œMy Businessā€ from ā€œOther Peopleā€™s Business,ā€ look behind you.
Anytime you find yourself feeling angry or stressed, chances are, youā€™re in Victim Consciousness. All you have to do in order to step back into integrity is ask yourself, ā€œWhose business is it?ā€
Now, I like to think that I can spot an idea for a good game show a mile away. I did, in fact, have a chance to pitch my idea for Whose Business Is It? to Howie Mandelā€™s people at NBC Universal. Unfortunately, they said ā€œNo deal.ā€ I remained undaunted by their obvious lack of vision (after all, these are the same people who, all evidence to the contrary, still believe that ā€œAmericaā€™s Got Talentā€), and filmed an episode anyway. You can watch it online at www.GetAngryGetHappy.com. Meanwhile, Iā€™ll teach you how to play the home version.
In order for something to be ā€œMy Business,ā€ it has to meet three criteria:
1. It must affect you, personally, right now.
2. It must be your responsibility.
3. You must be able to do something about it.
Unless a situation meets all three criteria, it is none of your business.
Remember, just because youā€™re involved in something doesnā€™t mean itā€™s any of your business!
Most people get hung up on #3, so let me take a moment to elaborate. Your being able to do something about a situation means that you are able to adjust, change, modify or alter the circumstances in some way. Note that if changing, adjusting, modifying or altering the circumstances requires that you get other people to change their behavior, youā€™re wasting your time. There is nothing you can do to get anyone else to behave the way you would like them to behave. (If you donā€™t believe me, ask my father.) If you can accept that you have no power to change anyone elseā€™s behavior, youā€™ll save yourself a tremendous amount of suffering, and significantly reduce the amount of time you spend in Victim Consciousness.
When you discover that youā€™re involved in a situation that is not your business, stop, take a step back, say, ā€œThis situation is none of my business,ā€ and then drop it.
For example:
ā€œThe economy is none of my business.ā€
ā€œThe government is none of my business.ā€
ā€œOther peopleā€™s marriages are none of my business.ā€
ā€œWhat my mother thinks of me is none of my business.ā€
When you drop the story and step back into ā€œMy Business,ā€ youā€™ll no longer feel angry; however, you will still have all of the energy of your anger available to you. Itā€™s important that you use this energy yourselfā€”otherwise, other people will steal it from you.
Take this extra energy and work it off at the gym. Use it to clean your garage, do your taxes, or remodel your kitchen. Whatever you do, donā€™t take any action that has anything at all to do with the story that was making you angry. The more you practice this, the more comfortable you will become using your own energy. In time, youā€™ll be able to store this extra energy and use it to become truly, completely happy. This is the first step towards mastering your anger.
___________________

Kevin B. Burk has been helping people around the world to improve their lives and relationships since 1996 through his astrological counseling and relationship coaching practice. His humor, wisdom and compassion are always present, in his books (ten so far, including Astrology: Understanding the Birth Chart, The Relationship Handbook: How to Understand and Improve Every Relationship in Your Life, and his newest book, Anger Mastery: Get Angry, Get Happy), his classes and workshops, and his interactions with his clients and students. Kevinā€™s focus is always on the practical, exploring how we can actually use astrology and spiritual practice on a daily basis to transform our lives.
In the astrology world, he is best known for making Classical Astrology accessible to everyone, taking complex and abstract concepts and showing how they can be used to create concrete, specific and practical interpretations. Kevinā€™s website, The Real Astrology with Kevin B. Burk is one of the premiere astrology resources on the Internet. His book, Astrology: Understanding the Birth Chart is a textbook used at Kepler University in their Undergraduate Astrology Degree program, and has been translated into Russian, and is currently being translated into Bulgarian. Kevinā€™s articles have appeared in The Mountain Astrologer, the Australian publication,Well Being Astrology, and in Llewellynā€™s Moon Sign books.
In the non-astrology world, Kevin is best known for his unique approach to understanding and improving all human relationships through The Relationship Handbook andThe Relationship Workshops.
Kevin has released a series of DVDs of his Law of Attraction workshops: the self-contained Prosperity & The Law of Attraction, and Astrology & The Law of Attraction, a series of 7 DVDs recorded live in Houston, TX at a weekend workshop for the Gulf Coast Chapter of NCGR.
Kevin has developed a revolutionary program for spiritual growth called Archetypal Astrology: The Heroā€™s Journey. This intensive program guides participants through the process of meeting and moving into Right Relationship with each of the seven Astrological Archetypes (you may know them as the seven personal planets).
Kevin is currently synthesizing astrology and spirituality into his next series of books: Astrology & The Law of Attraction, Prosperity & The Law of Attraction andRelationships & The Law of Attraction.
You can visit Kevinā€™s website at www.GetAngryGetHappy.com.
To get your paperback copy of  ANGER MASTERY by Kevin Burk: http://www.amazon.com/Anger-Mastery-Kevin-B-Burk/dp/0975968238
To purchase a copy of ANGER MASTERY at Barnes & Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/anger-mastery-kevin-b-burk/1104012568
Buy the book directly from the author at www.GetAngryGetHappy.com
Like Kevin Burk on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AngerMastery
__________
ABOUT ANGER MASTERY
Author Kevin B. Burk wants to make you angry. Burk believes that getting angry is the first step to happiness, and his newest book, Anger Mastery: Get Angry, Get Happy shows you how.
ā€œAnger is like fire,ā€ says Burk. ā€œWhen you master it, itā€™s a powerful source of energy. If you donā€™t master it, however, it can be dangerous and destructive.ā€ More importantly, Burk asserts, until you master your anger, other people will steal your energy, your power, and your ability to be happy.
The Anger Mastery Process has three phases. In Phase 1, you learn how to use more of your own energy, which makes it harder for other people to steal it from you. (This involves going to the gym at least five times a week.) You also learn how to leave Victim Consciousness and move into integrity by answering the question, ā€œWhose business is it?ā€
Phase 2 of the Anger Mastery process helps you to stay out of Victim Consciousness by learning how to feel Safe. You meet your Safety Needs with a tool called the Present Moment Awareness Safety Meditation, available for free at www.GetAngryGetHappy.com.
By the time you complete Phase 2, you will already notice significant changes in your life. In particular, you will have considerably more energy. Phase 3 shows you how to use that energy to become truly, completely happy.
Anger Mastery is not your typical book on anger. Not only is Burkā€™s approach unique, but also the book itself is laugh-out-loud funny. ā€œHumor is a powerful tool to shift consciousness,ā€ said Burk. ā€œLaughter instantly transforms anger. Plus, funny sells more books.ā€


[1] Byron Katie, Loving What Is: Four Questions that Can Change Your Life (New Yorkā€ Harmony Books, 2002), 3.



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